How I DON’T Do It All
I hope y’all had a great holiday weekend! Ours was wonderfully busy and fun. 🙂 We celebrated my husband’s birthday on Friday and my parents 35th anniversary on Monday.
You wouldn’t believe the emails and messages that I receive asking how I do it all. I hate to break it to y’all…but…
I don’t.
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I am wife, mom, manager of two home businesses, daughter, sister, friend, manager, diy-er, decorator, teacher, mediator, housekeeper, laundress, cook, boo-boo kisser, supervisor and probably something else I’m forgetting.
However, I don’t do it all.
I can’t because it’s physically and mentally impossible.
My house isn’t always ready for a photo shoot, but it is almost always ready for company. {I got over worrying about what people think about the crumbs on the floor or the dishes in the sink a long time ago.}
My kiddos aren’t always fresh out of a bath. Seriously. They are boys. I embrace the grime.
The laundry is often piled in a chair waiting to be folded and put away. {I am a rockin laundress, but my gifts end there. My amazing sister-in-law folds and puts it all away for me.}
I often leave dishes in the sink overnight. Fly Lady would keel over, I know.
I am a terrible leftover-cook. This sentence could also be read…We have a lot of various science experiments growing in the fridge.
I rarely blow my hair dry. Usually I hop out of the shower and twist it up into a bun. What mom likes her hair in her face all day anyway?
Many nights there are toys on the living room floor when I go to bed. As much as I love a fresh start in the morning, they are just going to get pulled out again.
There are nights that I don’t take off my makeup and wash my face before collapsing into bed. Thankfully that’s becoming more rare because I’m working on taking better care of me.
I work a lot. {probably too much}
I don’t want to regret these little years. So when emails and messages go unanswered or things just don’t get done, it’s not because I’m intentionally ignoring anyone or anything.
I intentionally choose to spend time with God.
I intentionally choose to spend time with my family.
I intentionally choose to spend time taking care of me – working out, eating right, taking time “off.” It’s hard to just close the computer and put the phone away, but the quiet is worth it.
I don’t do it all.
But by God’s grace, I am striving to do what’s MOST important.
I hate to disappoint, but I don’t have it all together all by myself. I have lists, notebooks, planners and people that help keep me on track. I have a lot of help. My sister-in-law comes twice a week to help me with the boys, with light housework and with social media. My husband is a huge help with projects, blog work and various tasks that I ask him to do. He’s a rockstar Dad. We are blessed to live next door to my parents and 15 minutes from my husband’s parents. My sister also helps me with business items as she can. I firmly believe that it takes a village.
As moms, we guilt ourselves and judge ourselves too often.
We are our own worst critic about what we do or don’t do, what we do well or not-so-well. We need to JUST STOP.
Stop thinking that your neighbor or friend does it all. She doesn’t. So stop getting all judgy on yourself.
Just do the best you can with what you have, be the BEST YOU that you can be for your family and give yourself a boatload of grace.
Because you are doing AWESOME!!!!
So, that’s how I don’t do it all.
Do you choose to NOT do it all too? What are the top 3 things that you choose to do instead of doing it all?
xoxo
Myra
Very well said! I think it’s great that you’re enjoying these wonderful days when your kids are young. Believe me, they go by way to fast.
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LOVE THIS! I’m a grandmother now, but I remember the days! Believe me! I have three sons and I definitely DID NOT do it all! You are asking for three things I choose now instead of doing it all? Devotions, first thing (a must!); walks – I take long walks now – and I go to bed early (9 PM usually).
Well said, Myra! I wish every young mom (or elder caregiver … or, really, every woman) could read this. I’m a grandmother now and have a lot of caregiving responsibilities for an elderly parent. I’m finding it is every bit as hard to “do it all” as I did as a young mom. Thankfully I have a wonderfully supportive, helpful hubby! Three things I choose rather than doing it all? Quality time with God, first every day; trying to do something creative daily; and getting enough sleep.
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Hi Myra – thank you so much for this. I was nodding my head in agreement, loved the Flylady reference, she would not be happy with me this morning I know that!!!
I have tears in my eyes too all of it is so true. Thank you for sharing with us. I am going to bookmark this page and on “those” days I will read it over and over. Leanne
Thanks for being so honest and open about your life. Our worth shouldn’t come from how much we get done in a day. Our worth comes from the Lord.
Much needed words of encouragement today. Thank you!!!
Love your blog!! I like how you said you choose to let the little things go and are intentional with the things that matter. Makes me think of this book that is on my read as soon as possible list The Best Yes by Lysa TerKeurst. http://thebestyes.com/ :o) Thank you for sharing!
Thank you so much for writing this!! I struggle with this too – my life looks “perfect” on FB or Instagram but it’s not. I intentionally make time for the important things, let go of the unimportant things, and stopped caring what people think of me. 😉
Needed to hear this so bad! Thanks for sharing!!
I prioritize and the things at the top get done. Family. Work obligations. Relatively clean house. It’s usually always clean-clean, but can be messy with projects and such being worked on.
I take naps. When I get overwhelmed or over tired. I will steal and nap and reset.
Like you said, no one can do it all. It’s impossible. There is only one us, and only so many hours in a day.
Myra, you truly are blessed. I totally agree with what you said and will save this to read it again.
Bless You, Toodles, Barbi
Myra! It’s a coincidence that I am reading this at right time, I choose to not do it all too. I also have boys and I have come a long way of embracing the changes in my life. I am happy to read that I am not alone. Just a few days ago I wrote about how I couldn’t do it all and rather decided to take a back seat from blogging!
Above all for me family comes first and I appreciate you sharing your thoughts. 🙂
Ughhhh I’m so tired it’s only 9: 50 am baby just fell asleep and I sit down with my cofee and a cookie been eyeing all morning …and I’m feeling overwhelmed baby crying all morning for attention when I got all these plans for the day and all that goes down the drain …he will be up in 30 min. That’s impossible to be out the house bags of clothe and me not looking like a freak in public to the laundromat or maybe im just over thinking or Lazy like my boyfriend calls me … but like u said all I want is some reassurance… before I keep trying to figure out all day why I can’t do anything right …im Glad I read this thank you .