The Tale of the Chicken Snake
Oh y’all. This chapter in the chronicle of Myra’s life cannot be missed, so I’m writing down for posterity. And for laughs. Really. If you are my friend on Facebook you might have already seen a bit of the snake saga, so forgive me for repeating myself. There are just so many funny details that I want to remember forever.
Yesterday afternoon, I walked to the back door to go out to the laundry room. Our house is 126 years old and has many additions…the laundry room being one of them. I kept hearing things bumping around out there and wondered what it was. As I pulled the door open, I saw this…
I think my mouth gaped open and I began making all sorts of animated, panicked noises. I might have also squealed and danced around like a crazy person. If only I was on candid camera or something so you could all really see how I reacted. It would have been a huge laugh and definitely a YouTube hit. Can’t you imagine? “Pregnant Lady doing Panicked Snake Dance.” Haha!
I gingerly closed the door without taking my eyes off the devious creature trying to get INSIDE my house.
I grabbed the phone and called my husband to please come home from work and take care of the snake. The conversation went something like this:
HUBS: Hello
Me: AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! There {panicked breathing} is {more panicked breathing} a….a…..s….sssssssnake {more panicked breathing} onnnnn…the back door. Like ON the back door.
HUBS: What kind is it? (Of course. The practical question.)
Me: I have no idea and I don’t really care. I don’t think it’s poisonous, but it’s TRYING TO GET IN THE HOUSE.
HUBS: Well, I have a lot to do here at work.
Me: Um, that’s not going to cut it. You have to come right now. {more squeals and dancing around for dramatic effects}
HUBS: I’m on my way. Click. (He’s my hero!)
As I stood there watching the snake while the hubster was on his way home, it started climbing higher and higher. I thought it might have found a hole to go up into the attic or something. So, I dashed like a crazy, careening, pregnant momma out the front door and all the way around the house to find this…{and then I was for real out of breath.}
OH. MY. WORD.
As I took this picture, I realized that the screen door wasn’t locked inside and that Ridley might run out at any moment. That wouldn’t be good. {shivers and shudders}
Then my hubby pulled up and I went running back around the house and in the front door.
He grabbed a garden hoe that my dad had just brought over that morning for my tomato plants. Perfect how that timing worked out.
My hubs looked at the snake and began questioning whether or not it was poisonous. After a call to my dad, they determined that it was more than likely a chicken snake or something similar = harmless.
Then, being my hilarious husband, he looked at me and said, “Boy, I wish this handle was about four feet longer.”
I almost fell over laughing.
He dragged the snake off the house and then the devious thing went UNDER the freezer on the back porch, of course. This resulted in moving the freezer, rocking the freezer, shaking the freezer…you get the idea.
Lest you think that my hubs was on top of the freezer with fright, let me clarify…he was rocking it back and forth trying to get the snake to move.
Finally, after a lot of sweat {and nervous giggles on my part}, the snake came out and the hubs took it way out to the woods. It was a bit injured from being under the freezer, so hopefully it will stay far, far away.
If it shows up again, it’s dead meat.
That’s the end {I hope} of the snake tale. {shivers again}
XO
*****
I really wish you could see me reading this post…I have my hand over the pictures…I am that terrified of snakes! So hilarious, but my skin is now crawling. Did you even sleep last night? I would have had nightmares. Kudos to your hubs! Mine probably would have called someone else.
Jessica @ Mom 4 Real
Jessica @ Mom 4 Real´s last blog post ..My Beachy Blue Bench
That is hysterical!
Johanna´s last blog post ..When it’s time to ditch the plan.
I sit here laughing because your story reminds me of the two times the “son of the devil” made an appearance at our house.
The first time company was at our front door and my phone rings…Becky don’t open the front door there is a huge snake climbing up the wall right by your door bell. Hubs came to the rescue and company came on in. 😉
Second time, we had just pulled into the basement after church. Got out of the car hubby first up the stairs, just as I reach the landing he says ‘stop” in a very quite but stern voice. I look to my left…there on the ledge “the son of the devil.” I jumped from the landing to the floor..no small feet..and locked myself in the car until hubby could dispose of this creature.
Hoping you will be snake free for quite a while. <3
I’m with Jessica on this one … I was TRYING not to look! How in the world did you have the nerve to get photos???? Wait…. one time…when there was this HUGE and I do mean HUGE (like 500 lbs. huge) bear nose to nose with our dog and hubby was hollering hand me my rifle…. I got my camera first. (besides, I don’t know a rifle from a shot gun or a 22 so I would have messed that part up anyways…might as well get a photo right?) Still, I don’t think I could have done the snake…. and when we lived in FL and had a ton of “harmless” black snakes around I made hubby kill them. They might be harmless to a normal person but they’d make me hurt myself trying to run away.
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Aww you have such a brave hubby to come all the way home from work and get the snake gone.
My husband and I are reading this and laughing hysterically. Sorry that you had to go through that but we were laughing because we had an almost identical situation and the story is pretty similar. I love where he says “what kind of snake is it”? Hope that’s the last of it.
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OH MY Myra! I’d be scared to death, too, but like you, I would grab my camera first. That being said, my hubs works far away so I’d have to deal with it. I’d prob give a kid a video camera to tape it, tho! (and I’ll be I wouldn’t have slept well, either!)
yuck yuck yuck! i would have done the same screaming dance…minus the preggers part! your man IS a hero! 🙂
I bet that was scary!!
OH. MY. WORD. And of course, you are a true blogger to remember to grab your camera before you ran out the door, lol!!! I would have been terrified!
Johanna´s last blog post ..When it’s time to ditch the plan.
He IS a Hero!!! That thing is HUGE! My word. I am impressed you didnt just pass out from fear. I would have done that. And I think I would have insisted that we kill it. I mean… it could come BACK! Er, forget I said that. 🙂
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Lynnette has had many snakes at her old house over the years too…and they just give me the willies! I had to giggle as I read your post Myra! I can totally understand why you would freak out!
Of course hubby had to come home…DUH!…how could he even think about leaving you there to handle it? (:>) I think he was just teasing you. That was a pretty good size snake! Harmless or not all I can say is ICK! (:>)
I am glad that Ridley didn’t come out while it was on the door!
Love, Linda
I would have done the dance as well. And the screams. And the panicked call to my hubby. Grin.
By the way, of course, my boys thought the snake pictures were cool….
blessings friend,
rachel
rachel @ finding joy´s last blog post ..Family – Strength United – Day 9 {Intentional Parenting}
OH MY GOODNESS! I hate snakes! We had a smiliar situation on our back deck, except my husband was in meetings in Atlanta(about 1 1/2 south of us) so he couldn’t get there for awhile. He is also a fire fighter, so the next thing I knew here comes the fire truck and rescue coming down our road! It was a pretty funny situation, they caught it, took it off to the woods, and I gave them a cake and thanked them over and over. To this day they still give me a hard time about the snake:) I decided the only kind of snake I like is a dead one, and I really don’t even like those lol! Glad yours is gone, and I hope it doesn’t come back!!
tori´s last blog post ..A Little Yellow Table
So funny, Myra! Once when my husband was out of town I found a snake in my garage. My teenaged sons were all hanging out next door–but I marched right over and told them I needed them to come home and deal with the snake. I actually said to them: “Dealing with snakes is not in my job description. I need a man to handle this!” They came straight to their mom’s rescue. 🙂
Insects and rodents I can handle. Snakes? Nope.
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Oh my – I don’t care what kind of snake they are – they are all poison to me.
I’m guessing this didn’t send you into labor – that would be a great story to tell.
Glad you and Ridley are ok.
OH MY STARS!!!! Yuck, yuck, yuck, yucky yuck!!! You are one brave lady, and so funny! We once had a snake in our house in Kansas, my son had been playing with his baseball glove outside and it had crawled inside (apparently they are partial to doing this!) I was checking on the kids before going to bed and saw an electrical cord slither……except it wasn’t a cord!!! The snake was only about 10 inches long and as fat as a marker but I screamed the place down!! I couldn’t sleep for weeks thinking snakes were in the heating ducts!!
FREAKING hilarious! I would have died. You handled that well. So did the hubs-and I love the pic of him on the freezer. he looks scared. HAHA! We had one crawl into our walls once. I made Jamin wait to see if it were poisonous or not, and he was all, ‘who cares! It should die!’ And I was all, animal rights and stuff. I gave it enough time to crawl into our walls and we didn’t see him for days. We thought it was going to be all snakes on a plane a-la the Mills hizzy. It wasn’t. We survived because he came back out. Good times. ;} Glad you survived!
ashley @ the handmade home´s last blog post ..ode to the chesterfield
Omg!!! I love that in between freaking out you took pictures!!
Angela Delf´s last blog post ..Our Not-so-Little Bundle
That was a funny one, oh I dislike them too and also spiders, I had to be very brave and kill about three of them a few months ago and believe me I don’t know where I got the courage to do it. It was either myself or a two year old and I knew she wasn’t going to do it.
Great story. One night when our daughter was about 12 we heard her screaming in her bedroom. We rushed into her and there was this HUGE black snake on the screen outside her window. She never left the window up again. My husband shot thru the screen and killed it. He as a horror of snake also. Its so scary. Think of the memories you will always have.
Jacque
This gives me the chills!!! Poisonous or not….no thank you!!!! So glad your Hubby rescued you!!!
Tara´s last blog post ..Ocean Shores
Oh Myra! I am laughing so hard at your conversation with hubs!! I just about snorted out my sweet tea!! I was freaking out yesterday when it was happening to you and I’m soooooo glad it wasn’t venomous! You’re hilarious girlfriend and yes, that would’ve made a great YouTube vid!
Kim @ Sand & Sisal´s last blog post ..Coral Lamp
Wow, that was really gross. All I kept thinking was, I hope you guys live in the midwest or down south, b/c if I saw something that big “climbing” my house, I’d never be able to come back in. That goodness you have a brave husband and everyone was safe, I’m sitting here freaking out about snakes now.
stacy´s last blog post ..I couldn’t do it
Oh my goodness. I love snakes and used to have one before I had kids but I think I would freak out if I saw one on the porch. It’s one thing to have one you get from a pet store, it’s another to have one from the wild. Thanks for sharing your adventure, it made me smile.
Karri
LOL!! So glad we don’t have snakes in New Zealand!!!
Glad your husband to come home to sort it out!! 🙂
OhMylanta!! That is sooo ughhhh, and you have a shining prince to come save you, which is the best part of the story to me 🙂
Oh my word. I would have passed out. *shudder*
Thank goodness he was able to come home and take care of that thing! *shudder*
That is a HUGE snake. HUGE. But you know that – you were there 😉
*shudder*
Shelley´s last blog post ..Park and Grass Play
GiiiiiiRL……GRODIE!! You are a much better person than I! I would be shrieking in horror to see this critter on my porch. So glad that it turned out to be non-poisonous and all turned out well. :O)
LOL! That is hilarious!! You took some great pictures! 🙂 I was a biology teacher for a long time and overall, animal lover. So, snakes don’t creep me out–well, ok, non-venomous snakes that is. In my house, it’s the hubs that isn’t as big a snake fan! I’m in AZ and have a few fun backyard stories of my own–the big difference is that I am the one that deals with them at my house! 😉
Sara @ Mom Endeavors´s last blog post ..Thanksgiving Point Tulip Festival #snapconf
Oh my goodness. I would have DIED! We don’t really have snakes where we are and I just would come out of my skin! Brave woman you are!
Rebecca Matthews´s last blog post ..Jamming with Maisy and Juna
Your grilled chicken strips are yummy, Mayra, thanks for sharing!! As for the snake’s I scrolled all the way down past them, can’t even stand to see a pic..No Thank You, Maam!
Unless such ‘critter’ is paying rent, point a gun at the area just behind the head and pull the trigger!
Oh my…. I would have passed out and then called a realtor b/c I’d be moving! c-: {Shudder}
Katie Hostetter´s last blog post ..Garden 2011
Oh my word! is right…that is one big snake, I would have passed out for sure! 😀
Deborah (Snackers Delight)´s last blog post ..Greek Inspired Fiddlehead Fern Salad
I would have been a mess if I were you! That thing is HUGE. I hope it stays away!
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